After a relationship ends, the world can get quite hazy. Remnants of the relationship continue to last in your mind and heart. The primary focus of this phase after a relationship needs to be regaining your focus. Re-establishing your personal goals and giving yourself time for your mind to clear up are important, not only to help you heal, but also to help you establish better relationships in the future. Thus, I recommend that people give themselves at least six months between ending one serious relationship, before even considering trying another.

After a seriously relationship ends, it’s important to remember that you aren’t immediately going to be a good relationship candidate. Being in a romantic relationship is the grand slam of personal relationships. In general, romantic relationships are the most complex kind of a relationship you can have. If you romantically pursue someone too quickly, you won’t be able to successfully gauge what you want, because you will simply be responding to the previous relationship.

The seriousness of a relationship can be quite subjective. Therefore, I typically would define a serious relationship as being with someone for over a year. You also want to determine if you had big plans together and spent at least four days a week together for much of that time. If you lived together, then things would be considered to be serious. In these circumstances, it is important for you to reanalyze what you want, what you have learned, and what you would change. If you don’t, you risk repeating the same mistakes. So although it can be challenging, take your time. You’ll dramatically increase the odds of future success.



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