How to Turn Towards Your Partner by Mindfully Engaging in Your Relationship
Whether your relationship feels like it’s in a rut or you just want to strengthen the bond you already have, one of the best ways to turn towards your partner is with mindfulness.
While it’s easy to throw around “mindfulness” as a buzz word nowadays, when it’s done correctly, it’s actually extremely effective. It’s great for dealing with issues like anxiety, stress, etc.
Also, mindfully engaging in your relationship can also help you to grow as a couple.
Here’s how can you be more mindfully engaged with your partner and what it can do for your relationship.
Silence Their Inner Critic
One of the easiest ways you can turn toward your partner with mindfulness is to give them a compliment. Try to go deeper than “you look nice today.” Instead, focus on something very specific for the moment. Think about how it makes you feel, and consider how it will make them feel.
Many of us aren’t fully aware of the missed opportunities that go by each day when we could have paid more attention and given our partner a compliment. By being mindful in the moment, you’re more likely to recognize those things.
Compliment the tie they’re wearing, for example. Or, let them know how proud you are of the work they’ve been doing lately.
Not only will this help to boost their self-esteem but it can help to silence their inner critic. When you’re mindfully engaging in your relationship, you’ll be able to see when that inner critic starts showing up. If your partner gets down on themselves or they seem stressed about something they’re doing wrong, you can help them through it.
Be supportive by using your words or even a simple touch. Letting your partner know you’re there for them and you think they’re great will help to leave that negative self-talk in the dust. As a result, you can foster more intimacy in your relationship.
Mindfully Avoid Conflict
A great area to use mindfulness in your relationship is when you’re frustrated or angry.
Every couple argues. But it’s how you get through those disagreements that makes a difference. It can be hard to practice mindfulness during an argument. Yet, if you’re able to do so, you can turn towards your partner and diffuse a stressful situation all at once.
By mindfully engaging in your arguments, you can take a step back and take a breath. Are you really focused on the current situation? Or, are you thinking about something your partner did yesterday, a week ago or last month? Holding onto problems of the past can make any fight ten times worse, and it isn’t fair to either of you.
Instead of being defensive immediately, choose to listen to your partner. You don’t have to agree with everything they say. By stopping and listening, though, you’re actively engaging in the moment. You’re letting them know that what they have to say matters. When you’re both in a calmer place, it can be easier to talk about something you disagree on without getting into a nasty fight.
If your relationship is truly important, you have to make it a priority. Turning toward your partner by mindfully engaging in your relationship can help.
If you’re not quite sure how to turn toward them, don’t worry. Again, it’s something that takes time and effort. Try being more mindful in other areas of your life, and it’ll be easier to transfer over to your relationship.
If you’re still not able to be mindfully engaging in your relationship or you need help, please don’t hesitate to contact us. We can work on turning towards your partner more effectively, helping to strengthen your relationship from the inside out.