How to Deal with Getting Ghosted in a Serious Relationship

Getting ghosted might be a new way of saying it. But someone suddenly “disappearing” in a relationship is nothing new. And, no matter what you want to call it, it can be very painful for the ghosted partner.

Being ghosted essentially means someone leaves or stands you up without warning. No phone calls, no text messages, and no explanations.

It’s more common in first dates or early on in relationships. However, it’s also not uncommon to get ghosted in a long-term, serious relationship. Unfortunately, that often makes the experience more painful.

Dealing with getting ghosted in a serious relationship is difficult. While you can’t ignore the problem completely, there are things you can do to make the process of getting through it easier.

Give Yourself Time to Get Over It

Any kind of breakup or separation in a long-term relationship is difficult. Especially when the breakup blindsides you. After all, experiencing the pain of your partner simply “vanishing” is dreadful.

One of the biggest mistakes people make is acting as though it doesn’t bother them or trying to move on right away.

While moving on eventually is important, it’s equally important to give yourself time to grieve the relationship. Let your emotions out, and don’t hold back with how you feel.

Furthermore, it always helps to have a support system in place. Friends, family, or even a therapist can help you deal with the things you might be feeling.

There needs to be a mourning period when something like this happens in a relationship.

Keep in mind that it won’t last forever. In fact, you can give yourself a “cut off” period. But, before that time, don’t be afraid to really set your emotions free and do what you need to grieve.

Don’t Over-Analyze

It’s tempting to think about what could have possibly gone wrong in your relationship for your partner to just leave. But, that often leads to over-analyzing, and it can set you up for a lot of extra pain.

The fact is, you may never fully know why they chose to leave. It could be something you did that they didn’t like, or it could be something going on in their own head. The possible reasons why they left are endless.

Trying to figure it all out will only cause you more pain. Plus, it won’t allow you the freedom to fully move on.

Sometimes, relationships that end in ghosting don’t have closure. Again, this can be difficult to handle. Yet, trying to keep in contact with your partner or figuring it out on your own will keep you “trapped” in the confines of the breakup for far too long.

You have to find closure within yourself in order to fully move on.

Think About What You’ve Learned

Whether a relationship is good or bad, we always learn something from it. Once you’ve gone through a period of mourning and you’re ready to move on in your life, it’s a good idea to think about what you experienced from your relationship.

Then, consider how you can use that to move forward in life.

Relationships help us to grow. You may never really understand why your partner left. Actually, that’s not even the most important thing. What you should focus on instead is how the entire experience can help you in your next relationship. Or, even with friendships or your personal growth.

If you’re really struggling after being ghosted in a serious relationship, don’t worry. The pain and confusion won’t last forever.

You may not be able to get the relationship off your mind. If this is the case, please contact me. Together, we can discuss more solutions that will help you to get through this difficult time, finding personal growth and peace.

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1 Comment
  1. My relationship of 4 months feels like it’s being ghosted. We’ve been together for awhile obviously so I never felt like this would’ve happened. He’s coming off distant lately with the cover up of how he’s stress over getting a new job. He’s been avoiding me for a couple of days and he’s response was “Hey what’s up I’m at home, won’t be able to hang out for a little while want to get resume and new job“. He expected me to not say anything else about it and I guess just let him talk to me whenever he felt like it. Being in a committed relationship like we had all this time I didn’t think it was acceptable and he should be reaching out to me if not no one else. I feel my time has been wasted of 4 months dating and he’s trying to throw it away over stress, and get a new job and a new life with someone else. This is not what I expected from my first ever relationship and boyfriend.

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